estimate child support, free legal templates, pro se legal help, child support lawyers, free printable legal forms

estimate child support, free legal document template, your city lawyer
free printable legal forms, free downloadable legal forms, find legal forms

LAWYER JOKES

For some odd reason, people just love lawyer jokes. Most lawyers I've known personally are actually hard-working good people. Fortunately, they are good-natured and tolerant of the fact that we just have to have to make fun of them!

So here are a few clean and short lawyer jokes to lighten the mood a little:

An attorney telephoned the governor just after midnight, insisting that he talk to him regarding a matter of utmost urgency. An aide eventually agreed to wake up the governor. "So, what is it?" grumbled the governor.

"Judge Garber has just died" said the attorney, "and I want to take his place." Replied the governor "Well, its OK with me if its OK with the undertaker."


self help law, lawyer jokes, clean lawyer jokes

The patent attorney turns away from his window, the invention in his hand, and exclaims to the inventor: "Death ray my ass! It hardly even slows them down!"


It was so cold last winter that I saw a lawyer with his hands in his own pockets.


A man walked into a bar with his alligator and asked the bartender, "Do you serve lawyers here?". "Sure do," replied the bartender. "Good," said the man. "Give me a beer, and I'll have a lawyer for my 'gator."


There was the cartoon showing two people fighting over a cow. One was pulling the cow by the tail; the other was pulling on the horns. Underneath was a lawyer milking the cow.


If you laid all of the lawyers in the world, end to end, on the equator ---- It would be a good idea to just leave them there.


A countryman between two lawyers is like a fish between two cats. ...Benjamin Franklin.


A housewife, an accountant and a lawyer were asked "How much is 2+2?" The housewife replies: "Four!". The accountant says: "I think it's either 3 or 4. Let me run those figures through my spreadsheet one more time." The lawyer pulls the drapes, dims the lights and asks in a hushed voice, "How much do you want it to be?"


A Dublin lawyer died in poverty and many barristers of the city subscribed to a fund for his funeral. The Lord Chief Justice of Orbury was asked to donate a shilling. "Only a shilling?" said the Justice, "Only a shilling to bury an attorney? Here's a guinea; go and bury 20 of them."
A woman and her little girl were visitng the grave of the little girl's grandmother. On their way through the cemetary back to the car, the little girl asked, "Mommy, do they ever bury two people in the same grave?" "Of course not, dear." replied the mother, "Why would you think that?" "The tombstone back there said 'Here lies a lawyer and an honest man.'"
The defendent who pleads their own case has a fool for a client, but at least there will be no problem with fee-splitting.
God decided to take the devil to court and settle their differences once and for all. When Satan heard this, he laughed and said, "And where do you think you're going to find a lawyer?"
Santa Claus, the tooth fairy, an honest lawyer and an old drunk are walking down the street together when they simultaneously spot a hundred dollar bill. Who gets it? The old drunk, of course, the other three are mythological creatures.
What's the definition of a lawyer? A mouth - with a life support system.
Thankfully, they speak out for us when we really need them!


If You Know Of Somewhere To Get Ink Cheaper Than Carrot Ink, Let Us Know!


If you liked the Lawyer Jokes, you might enjoy Wierd Missouri Laws or Weird Kansas Laws


So, Who's Been Calling?

- -

Return to Home Page from Lawyer Jokes



state specific forms, legal documents by state

legal letter template, sample legal letters

child-support-lawyers, free child support calculator

DUI, DWI, OUI, drunk driving, best DUI lawyers

fix speeding ticket, beat speeding ticket, SIS, MIP, best traffic lawyers

XML RSSFollow Legal Self Help

XML RSS
follow us in feedly
Add to My Yahoo!
Add to My MSN
Subscribe with Bloglines

Bookmark and Share

HOME PAGE Legal Self Help Blog YOUR STORY

LEGAL FORMS

Our FREE Legal Forms Legal Forms By State Sample Legal Letters Top 20 Legal Forms

INTERNATIONAL FORMS & LETTERS

Spanish Legal Forms Canadian Legal Forms UK British Legal Forms Australian Forms Scottish Legal Forms New Zealand Forms Legal Forms India

FAMILY LAW

Prenuptial Agreement Marriage Certificates Cohabitation Partners Change Your Name Legal Separation Filing For Divorce Child Power of Attny Child Support Laws Child Support Lawyers Internet Child Safety Domestic Violence Assault and Battery Hidden Marital Assets

DUI DWI OUI

DUI Consequences DUI Fines/Penalties Best DUI Lawyers DUI DWI Classes Field Sobriety Tests DWI DUI Video Alcohol Calculator Minor In Possession MIP Expungement SR22 Insurance SIS / SES

TRAFFIC CHARGES

Speeding Ticket FAQ Camera Issued Tickets Speed Trap Locations Suspended License Hardship License Reckless Driving Hit and Run

FINANCE

Bankruptcy Chapt 7 Bankrupcy Chapt 13 Credit Card Interest Credit Repair Loan Modification Financial Resources Identity Theft

BUSINESS

Employment Apps Vacation Rental Forms Promissory Note Car Bill of Sale Our Home Business Incorporate Easily

INJURY LAWSUITS

Medical Malpractice Wrongful Death Slip and Fall Personal Injury Nursing Home Abuse Defective Medicine Defective Products Assault and Battery Mesothelioma Worker's Comp

ESTATE PLANNING

Last Will Living Will Quitclaim Deed Power Of Attorney Revoke POA Elder Abuse

LEGAL SELF HELP

Legal Self Help Tips Legal Self Help Blog Find People Legal Self Help Books Self Defense Cases Men's Legal Resources Women's Resources Minor's Resources

LEGAL HUMOR

Lawyer Jokes World's Best DUI Video Deal Or No Deal Wierd Kansas Laws Wierd Missouri Laws

| Homepage | Contact Us | Link To Us | Privacy | About Us | Site Map | Advertising Disclosure |

Click Just Below For Easy "Copy and Paste" Link!

The choice of a lawyer is an important decision that should not be based solely on advertisements.
The information on this website is in no way a substitute for specific, directed advice from a lawyer. Read Disclaimer

Return to top

Copyright© Your City Lawyer